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Thread: How tough is Chuck Norris?

  1. #1
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    Default How tough is Chuck Norris?

    Chuck Norris grinds his coffee with his teeth then boils the water with his own rage!!!
    James

    "I've learned that whatever hits the fan will not be evenly distributed." -DP-

    "I've also learned that you can keep vomiting long after you think you're finished." -DP-

  2. #2
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    Chuck Norris NEVER uses smilies on a BBS!!!
    PL Laird

    2012 Yamaha FZ8
    My other bike is a Dubya Arr Fo Fiddy Eff

    "Good judgment comes from experience,...experience comes from bad judgment."

    Check out the TSBA Austin Chapter on Facebook

  3. #3
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    Gary Stoops
    '01 CBR 929RE
    '06 FJR 1300A

  4. #4
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    Chuck Norris PokeMon card.

    PL Laird

    2012 Yamaha FZ8
    My other bike is a Dubya Arr Fo Fiddy Eff

    "Good judgment comes from experience,...experience comes from bad judgment."

    Check out the TSBA Austin Chapter on Facebook

  5. #5
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    lol...Jason had one that was pretty good.

    Super Man wears Chuck Norris Pajamas to bed!!!
    James

    "I've learned that whatever hits the fan will not be evenly distributed." -DP-

    "I've also learned that you can keep vomiting long after you think you're finished." -DP-

  6. #6
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    When Chuck Norris was denied a Egg McMuffin at McDonald's because it was 10:35am, he then round house kicked the store so hard that it became a Wendy's!
    Mase Molina
    2009-2011 RGV Chapter President
    Cell# 956.342.2631
    email: nursemmolina at yahoo dot com
    1999 BMW K1200RS
    2004 KAWASAKI ZX10R (sold)
    2007 KAWASAKI ZX1400R
    2004 Ducati 749R No.189
    1985 Honda VF1000R

    "If you don't ride in the rain, you don't ride."~Author
    Unknown

    "I drive way too fast to worry about cholesterol. "

    I believe many Harley guys spend more time revving their engines than actually driving anywhere; I sometimes wonder why they bother to have wheels on their motorcycles.
    Dave Barry

  7. #7
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    Chuck Norris can kickstart a car.
    Mase Molina
    2009-2011 RGV Chapter President
    Cell# 956.342.2631
    email: nursemmolina at yahoo dot com
    1999 BMW K1200RS
    2004 KAWASAKI ZX10R (sold)
    2007 KAWASAKI ZX1400R
    2004 Ducati 749R No.189
    1985 Honda VF1000R

    "If you don't ride in the rain, you don't ride."~Author
    Unknown

    "I drive way too fast to worry about cholesterol. "

    I believe many Harley guys spend more time revving their engines than actually driving anywhere; I sometimes wonder why they bother to have wheels on their motorcycles.
    Dave Barry

  8. #8
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    Chuck Norris can divide by zero.

    Chuck Norris destroyed the Periodic Table, because Chuck Norris only recognizes the Element of surprise.
    Mase Molina
    2009-2011 RGV Chapter President
    Cell# 956.342.2631
    email: nursemmolina at yahoo dot com
    1999 BMW K1200RS
    2004 KAWASAKI ZX10R (sold)
    2007 KAWASAKI ZX1400R
    2004 Ducati 749R No.189
    1985 Honda VF1000R

    "If you don't ride in the rain, you don't ride."~Author
    Unknown

    "I drive way too fast to worry about cholesterol. "

    I believe many Harley guys spend more time revving their engines than actually driving anywhere; I sometimes wonder why they bother to have wheels on their motorcycles.
    Dave Barry

  9. #9
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    my fav:

    "If you see Chuck Norris, he sees you.... If you don't see Chuck Norris, you have seconds to live"

    Carlos Muriel
    "Speedy McSpeed"
    TSBA RGV Chapter Geek/WebmasterCowbell Sensei
    2008 Ducati 848 Slave I
    2003 CBR600RR TIE/x1 Fighter --- Sold to a Corellian Smuggler
    "Four wheels move the body, two wheels move the soul"

    http://mandalorian.wordpress.com/

    Quote Originally Posted by MaseK12rs View Post
    I'm a Honda guy.



  10. #10
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    Chuck Norris does not "style" his hair. It lies perfectly in place out of sheer terror.
    James

    "I've learned that whatever hits the fan will not be evenly distributed." -DP-

    "I've also learned that you can keep vomiting long after you think you're finished." -DP-

  11. #11
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    lol I'm still laughing at the element of surprise. Good one Mase.

    Here's a couple more.

    Chuck Norris counted to infinity, twice.

    When Chuck Norris was born, the only person who cried was the doctor. Never slap Chuck Norris.
    James

    "I've learned that whatever hits the fan will not be evenly distributed." -DP-

    "I've also learned that you can keep vomiting long after you think you're finished." -DP-

  12. #12
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    Chuck Norris invented the Caesarean section when he roundhouse-kicked his way out of his monther's womb.
    Jeff Folk
    2004 Honda VFR 800fi (Åsa)
    1996 Suzuki GSX750ft (Lucy)


    ^^^ Don't be this guy!^^^

  13. #13
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    Truman BA Campbell
    a.k.a. "Internet Tuff Guy"
    2KX RGV Chapter Sectary


    03 ZZR 1200
    MonCallimari MC101B "Home One" Star Cruzer
    BIG BLUE BEAST

    99 ish' GSXR 750
    "Modified" Corielian YT1300F
    "You know, that ship's saved my life quite a few times. She's the fastest hunk of junk in the galaxy!"~Lando~


  14. #14
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    Truman BA Campbell
    a.k.a. "Internet Tuff Guy"
    2KX RGV Chapter Sectary


    03 ZZR 1200
    MonCallimari MC101B "Home One" Star Cruzer
    BIG BLUE BEAST

    99 ish' GSXR 750
    "Modified" Corielian YT1300F
    "You know, that ship's saved my life quite a few times. She's the fastest hunk of junk in the galaxy!"~Lando~


  15. #15
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    For the gamers.....

    Truman BA Campbell
    a.k.a. "Internet Tuff Guy"
    2KX RGV Chapter Sectary


    03 ZZR 1200
    MonCallimari MC101B "Home One" Star Cruzer
    BIG BLUE BEAST

    99 ish' GSXR 750
    "Modified" Corielian YT1300F
    "You know, that ship's saved my life quite a few times. She's the fastest hunk of junk in the galaxy!"~Lando~


  16. #16
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    For the LOL Catz

    Truman BA Campbell
    a.k.a. "Internet Tuff Guy"
    2KX RGV Chapter Sectary


    03 ZZR 1200
    MonCallimari MC101B "Home One" Star Cruzer
    BIG BLUE BEAST

    99 ish' GSXR 750
    "Modified" Corielian YT1300F
    "You know, that ship's saved my life quite a few times. She's the fastest hunk of junk in the galaxy!"~Lando~


  17. #17
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    Default

    Truman BA Campbell
    a.k.a. "Internet Tuff Guy"
    2KX RGV Chapter Sectary


    03 ZZR 1200
    MonCallimari MC101B "Home One" Star Cruzer
    BIG BLUE BEAST

    99 ish' GSXR 750
    "Modified" Corielian YT1300F
    "You know, that ship's saved my life quite a few times. She's the fastest hunk of junk in the galaxy!"~Lando~


  18. #18
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    Default

    Truman BA Campbell
    a.k.a. "Internet Tuff Guy"
    2KX RGV Chapter Sectary


    03 ZZR 1200
    MonCallimari MC101B "Home One" Star Cruzer
    BIG BLUE BEAST

    99 ish' GSXR 750
    "Modified" Corielian YT1300F
    "You know, that ship's saved my life quite a few times. She's the fastest hunk of junk in the galaxy!"~Lando~


  19. #19
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    Truman BA Campbell
    a.k.a. "Internet Tuff Guy"
    2KX RGV Chapter Sectary


    03 ZZR 1200
    MonCallimari MC101B "Home One" Star Cruzer
    BIG BLUE BEAST

    99 ish' GSXR 750
    "Modified" Corielian YT1300F
    "You know, that ship's saved my life quite a few times. She's the fastest hunk of junk in the galaxy!"~Lando~


  20. #20
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    You helped make my day! I had a very bad day today!
    Thanks amigo!
    Mase Molina
    2009-2011 RGV Chapter President
    Cell# 956.342.2631
    email: nursemmolina at yahoo dot com
    1999 BMW K1200RS
    2004 KAWASAKI ZX10R (sold)
    2007 KAWASAKI ZX1400R
    2004 Ducati 749R No.189
    1985 Honda VF1000R

    "If you don't ride in the rain, you don't ride."~Author
    Unknown

    "I drive way too fast to worry about cholesterol. "

    I believe many Harley guys spend more time revving their engines than actually driving anywhere; I sometimes wonder why they bother to have wheels on their motorcycles.
    Dave Barry

  21. #21
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    I'm afraid to comment. Chuck Norris is watching. He sees all, knows all and kicks all a$$.
    Gregg Crow
    For information about the Panhandle TSBA contact me at pak714 at isp dot com or check out http://panhandlesportbike.com/

  22. #22
    Ninja Master 10R's Avatar
    Ninja Master 10R is offline AKA "The TicketMaster" I look better on video...
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    ha-larious, this post, not Chuck Norris, i'm with Backmarker, the all-knowing, all-seeing Chuck is out there!
    Kasey Lewis
    2011 RGV Chapter Vice President
    Cell: 956-227-5765
    kasey.lewis@valleyarmature.com


    "I did it because i could, not because i thought it was smart!"


    CMRA #272 Novice
    2008 ZX-10R Jack Daniels Bike

    2001 GSXR600 Coca-Cola Bike
    2002 GSXR600 VAE/Amsoil Race Bike

  23. #23
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    lol

    Carlos Muriel
    "Speedy McSpeed"
    TSBA RGV Chapter Geek/WebmasterCowbell Sensei
    2008 Ducati 848 Slave I
    2003 CBR600RR TIE/x1 Fighter --- Sold to a Corellian Smuggler
    "Four wheels move the body, two wheels move the soul"

    http://mandalorian.wordpress.com/

    Quote Originally Posted by MaseK12rs View Post
    I'm a Honda guy.



  24. #24

    Default

    Chuck Norris ordered a Big Mac at Burger King... And got it!
    Jason A Balencia Sr
    2011 RGV Chapter Secretary
    956-501-9731

    **********************************
    Not As Lean, Not As Mean, Always A MARINE!
    **********************************


  25. #25
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    LOL...Good one Jason. Kinda like Mase's McDonald-Wendy one. I wish I had pics like Truman contributions.
    Here's another one to keep the thread going:

    Chuck Norris does not own a stove, oven or microwave because revenge is a dish best served cold.
    James

    "I've learned that whatever hits the fan will not be evenly distributed." -DP-

    "I've also learned that you can keep vomiting long after you think you're finished." -DP-

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